Here I am about to start a virtual coaching session from my son’s playroom (shhh). I love the flexibility of my work and helping clients find the work they love. I am recalling an article I wrote some time ago about my own path to finding the work I love:
🦋 Dream Job 🦋
My first career spanned the fields of fashion, makeup and beauty editorial. I had a curious mind and an unshakable determination to succeed in a “make a difference” kind of way. So I dived into the process with gumption and heart. I often stayed up working through the night and tried like Hell Meets Hell to be a great creative of sorts. I think I loved the “idea” of working in the glamour scene, planning spectacular fashion shows and having a beauty column in an international publication. What I really loved was connecting with people at an unfiltered level, where truth and soul emerge. The reality is that I never got hooked on the fast-paced, competitive fashion world. I felt like a fish out of water. I began contemplating this question: Do I like the path? I didn’t know where I wanted to be in five years, if I even had aspirations or goals within my industry. I knew that if I couldn’t get excited about the path then I better rethink my career and be willing to consider a lifestyle makeover. So I spent a lot of time leaning into my discomfort and discerning whether I loved the process. If you’ve ever been around someone who loves what they do, you’ll notice that they love the process. For lack of a better word, I’ll call them Process Lovers.
Process lovers are fully in their rhythm, as if what they’re doing is a free-flowing expression of who it is they are. They feel energized by their work and have a confidence about them that comes from a deep sense of fulfillment. Process lovers are able to find joy in their consistent commitment to the process. They wake up every morning to do the work they love no matter how seemingly small the material reward. They treat every part of the process with 𝑒𝑞𝑢𝑎𝑙importance.
When you find work that feels aligned with your life-affirming values and brings forth your 𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑛𝑐𝑒 qualities, you aren’t the one primarily feeding the drive. Rather, the work invigorates you.
Process lovers feel a strong desire to keep doing the work that allows them to fully express themselves. They feel bold and courageous when they’re being authentic. When they experience fear, it’s a different kind of fear — it’s a good fear. It’s what I call “courageous fear,” the kind that propels you into action instead of paralyzing you into complacency. Process lovers don’t let fear stop them from staying true to their vision. They look at fear like a serious suggestion. They listen, gain understanding, and choose how to best respond. Fear is neither a decision maker nor a deal breaker when considering life dreams.
Process lovers engage in every task as though they have already manifested their goals. And, in a way, they have: on the inside.
When you have found a true path, you’re in harmony with the truth of who you are. So you see, then you’re living in your light, you’re already “reaching the stars,” so to speak. When you’re able to have a relationship with something that feels larger than yourself, you’re higher in your knowing, you’re higher in your thinking, you’re higher in your ideas. And when you’re living from this synchronous place, you will, effortlessly, create a life to support your higher self.
When I began my clinical psychology program, even though I had taken only two undergraduate psychology courses, I felt as though I already had a grasp of the coursework. It felt as if I had been doing fieldwork for years. In some ways, this was true. I had always been drawn to understanding the psychological self and spiritual component underlying human behavior and emotional trauma. My fascination with the dichotomies of the human experience brought about my interest in culture. During my stints working in Asia, I witnessed joy and pain, courage and fear, dreams and limiting beliefs, love and hate, hope and acceptance, universal desires and disappointments, tremendous suffering and miraculous transformation. Immersing myself in other people’s stories felt completely natural for me. With a focused interest in human studies, I was on the path of doing the part of the work that I was drawn to in my previous work: connecting with people.
I realized that in my former career I had acquired a skillset. In my clinical work, however, I was using more than just my skills. I could bring all of me into my work, my skillset and talent, what I call “signature brilliance.” That thing that we do best, that feels like an extension of ourselves, as though we inherited from somewhere a built-in knowing which seems to come through us. When I worked with clients, I felt like I could bring my truest qualities to my work. It felt as though I was doing something bigger than myself. This made the work feel sacred. When I wasn’t combining my skills with my inherent strengths and talent, the work often felt overwhelming, draining and shallow. It was difficult to stay motivated.
It can take time to find “your” process — which is essentially the inner workings of your dream job. If you haven’t found your truest career path, then you must learn to embrace the path you are on and the process of discovering the work that matches your courageous rhythm. When you are able to accept and trust that you are being guided to a lit path that is uniquely yours, you can access your high vibration or your most truthful expression of yourself, in every moment, and be led to your truest heart’s desire.
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