What to Say When Things Fall Apart – Seven Love Prompts
I remember when a lesbian couple came to see me because they wanted to consciously uncouple. It was a raw, messy, deeply vulnerable process — one of the most challenging processes I had been through with a couple.
Being able to say you are sorry sincerely and really mean it is one of the most healing ways partners can assuage negative feelings and allow healing.
Some healing prompts I like to use are:
I’m sorry…
I forgive…
I will always cherish…
I smile whenever I think about…
I see more clearly how…
Because of you…
Thank you…
I’m sorry I couldn’t see the pain and sadness you have been carrying sooner.
I’m sorry for all the times I failed to notice what you needed from me.
I’m sorry I have been too wrapped up in my own problems to recognize your bids for connection.
I’m sorry I didn’t take your hand, look into your eyes and let you know how much I deeply care.
I’m sorry for expecting too much from you.
I’m sorry I lost myself.
I’m sorry I didn’t nourish our love.
I’m sorry I wasn’t honest with you about my feelings —that I wasn’t honest with myself about my feelings.
I forgive all the ways we hurt each other.
I forgive all the ways we let our egos prevent us from listening to each other and gaining understanding.
I forgive all the breakdowns, lack of communication, hurtful words and actions, and pain.
I forgive how we lost our way, our dreams, our truth.
I forgive how we couldn’t see a better way and let things fall through the cracks.
I forgive all the withholding of love from each other.
I forgive all the times we chose fear over fighting for what we truly desired.
I forgive all the disappointment — and neglecting each other’s heart.
I forgive everything that happened between us.
I will always cherish our meaningful talks and quirky traits and idiosyncrasies that were uniquely us.
I will always cherish the laughter, giddy play, and silly phrases we used to say.
I will always cherish the love we truly shared.
I smile whenever I think about…
I smile whenever I think about the beautiful times and late nights together.
I see more clearly how…
I see more clearly how I might have done it differently.
Because of you, I have learned how to live more openly and honestly.
Because of you, I have learned to be more kind and rooted in integrity.
Thank you for the incredible journey — the good, the bad, the sweet, the bitter, the hard, the tender — all of it mattered.
Thank you for helping me to embody pure love — Who I Am — Who You Are.
We deserve to be happy and experience love, health, abundance, and aliveness.